Day 26: Flexibility

Excitement for the day: I was having some chocolate ice cream after dinner tonight when the syringe just absolutely EXPLODED.  Everywhere.  Chocolate got all over my face, the couch, my clothes, just UGH everywhere.  #liquiddietproblems.  And this isn't the first time this has happened: I'm still finding dried applesauce all over the kitchen!  I will be so happy when I can eat normally again!

Other than that little fiasco, today mostly consisted of trying to stay limber.  My muscles have been unusually tight lately and my back has been in spasm from inactivity.  (In addition to the whole jaw problem, I also have moderate to severe scoliosis, but that's a whole different story-- I got the best genes I know)  So, I picked through YouTube to find yoga and zumba videos and spent the day keeping flexible in a sports bra and spandex!  Now I'm feeling so much better!  I'm just itching to be active again, but it's difficult if I can't open my mouth to breathe.  One more day till my appointment with the surgeon!  Crossing my fingers that he'll be in a good mood and take off my bands.

What I was up to today!

OH and also a bit of good news: I had this muscle in my face that's been so painful to move whenever I tried to smile that now doesn't hurt anymore!  I still experience weird sensations when I animate, but it's mostly feelings of numbness and soreness.  No more pain woohoo! :)

Day 25: Silent Expression

I woke up today feeling artsy as HELL.  The morning consisted of downloading a plethora of new music which I then listened to all afternoon while sketching on the patio in a wifebeater and pajama pants!

Look at how happy she is without braces... 

Losing my voice has steered me towards alternative modes of expression, namely writing and art!  I've become so much more in touch with creativity now that I've had all this excess time to myself.  This I am grateful for and appreciative of, but the aftermath of jaw surgery still sucks.  I guess I'm just still seeking out positivity in the midst of all this shit.  Things have been stable for so long that I need to actively remind myself that I will not have to be silent or foodless forever.  I've almost become accustomed to this lifestyle.  Maybe some small part of me will miss not feeling the obligation to go out or speak-- it's an opportunity to learn more about oneself.  Though I still see friends, it's usually to just to watch a movie or show (I can't do much!).  It might even be strange to readjust to my previous life of talking, eating, smiling.  What if I can't remember how?